Coming Out of The Closet

I'm coming out of the closet, and to be honest I'm really not ashamed. A person can shake their head at me and be upset with the choices I make in life, but that's just it; these are my choices, and my life. The best thing you can do is to be supportive. Maybe not of what I do, but of me.
I struggle with this every single day. I don't condone it. I don't think other people should be the way I am. But I am a thousands of pieces of other people, that I have actually lost who I really am.
I have always been this way, long before children, even after having my girls, whether or not it was (or even is) recognized by other people, it is true and this isn't a cry of attention. These things are real. I just chose today to be the day I decide to openly speak about it.
It's really no ones fault that these things happen. Not the media, not my friends or family, and defiantly not myself. I was just born this way, this is just something I have accepted a long time ago and It's really more tiresome to not talk about it than it is too just well,. . . talk about it.
Why should I be alone? Why should I isolate the way I am? Just because society says I'm wrong? This might sound very teen of me but honestly... Fuck society. I'm not conforming to you.

So lets let the cat out of the bag:

I am 'Pro-Ana'. Yes, I have an eating disorder. And yes, you probably think it's ridiculous. But, it's not to me and no, this is not something I 'need help' for. This is how I was born, this is a part of me.
I binge eat, I purge, hell I even starve myself. My weight can fluctuate up and down of 10 or 15lbs in a month. Binging honestly gets the best of me most of the time, I mean . . . look at me, I'm a fat ass so you can obviously tell.
Having an eating disorder is hard. Hard in the way that I was having to hide it when I really shouldn't have to. I'm an adult, I can make my own decisions. If I want to taste food then go purge in the shower I can, and probably will.

My 'thinsperation' for today:



Nothing tastes as good as thin feels! Don't let today's moment forsake tomorrow's dream!


Kimberlea.